Nurturing the relationship and keeping the desire alive when trying to get pregnant
Trying to conceive is a period that can be filled with hopes, expectations and sometimes even challenges. It is easy for the focus to become more about getting the day and time right, and for this to overshadow the feeling of closeness and desire for each other.
During this period, it can be helpful to focus not only on achieving your shared goal of becoming parents, but also on nurturing and strengthening your relationship with your partner. Here are some things you can do to help nurture your relationship and foster your desire for each other.
- Communication: Open and honest communication is one of the keys to managing all the emotions and expectations that may arise while trying to conceive. Finding ways to respectfully express your fears, hopes and possible frustrations to each other can be an approach to strengthen the relationship both in the short and long term.
- Managing stress: Trying to conceive can be a stressful and challenging situation for both body and mind. If you are experiencing this in your relationship, it can be helpful to find ways to relax and manage the stress together. Engaging in activities together such as walking, yoga or a night in can help reduce your stress levels and strengthen your sense of connection and desire for each other.
- Supporting each other: Although you may sometimes feel the loneliest person in the world during the process of becoming pregnant, it is good to remember that (most of the time) there is another person in the same situation as you, namely your partner. Finding support from them and supporting each other through the process can help strengthen your relationship.
This can include sharing your feelings with each other about treatments, doctor's appointments, and any disappointments that the process may sometimes bring. Showing care, empathy and understanding towards each other can strengthen the bond between you and your partner, and create the feeling that you are going through this as a team. - Prioritize your relationship: Sometimes trying to get pregnant can take over your relationship and other aspects of your life. It is important not to forget to prioritize both yourself and your relationship, and spend time together outside of the focus on getting pregnant. Planning date nights, trips or just making time for each other in everyday life can help strengthen the relationship and find your way back if you have lost each other during the journey towards the baby.
- Keeping expectations realistic: What you should be aware of is that getting pregnant can take time and does not always go as planned. Having realistic expectations and being prepared to face challenges along the way can help reduce any strain on your relationship. It can also be helpful to remind yourself and each other that your journey is unique and to sometimes shift the focus to the shared journey rather than the final outcome.
- Take professional help: Although the tips above can be useful tools to try to strengthen the relationship at home, it should be emphasized that there is also good professional help available, for example in the form of couples therapy. It is good to know that there are also couples' therapists who specialize in the desire for children and involuntary childlessness. If you have experienced a miscarriage along the way, we recommend our content on terminated pregnancy, where Coach Liss specializes in these areas.
Read also: Practical tips on how to take care of yourself after a miscarriage.

